The One CHEESE Ring!
Originally published January 19, 2016. Updated on 9/9/2021
Recently, I had to make something to bring to a Lord of the Rings themed potluck.
I was on a big cheese kick (as always!), with a lot of cheese in the fridge.
We started with the idea of somehow making a LOTR cheese ball (??), and that idea quickly spawned the final plan:
We would make The One Cheese Ring.
The One Cheese Ring
I like to make cheese balls in the same way I make my Fromage Fort:
See what we have in the fridge, use a bit of everything.
What can I say, I like adventure!
For the less adventurous / those without a ridiculous amount of cheese sitting around, you can always go with a mix of cheddars, goudas, etc - it's all good!
Piping the One Ring Inscription
When it comes to the black speech piped on the side, I decided to use Sun dried tomato paste, which you can buy in a tube.
Really, you can flavour the cream cheese with anything you like, and tint it any colour you like.
Dijon mustard, horse radish, pesto paste, etc.
If using pesto paste, use one without nut chunks in it, or it will be hard to pipe.
You can get basil paste in the produce section of many grocery stores.
Once you've piped the Black Speech onto the cheese ring, you may feel an overwhelming desire to keep THE PRECIOUS all to yourself ... but you should probably share The One Cheese Ring with friends.
2 ½ lbs of cheese is a LOT, even for the tricksiest of Hobbits.
Wanna Nerd out With Us Some More?
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That Time I made a TARDIS Cake for Geek Royalty..
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The One Cheese Ring
- 1 Small Onion chopped
- 5 Garlic cloves pressed
- 2 tablespoon Dijon Mustard
- 1 lb Cream Cheese softened
- Splash Dry White Wine
- 1 ½ lbs Cheese of Choice grated
- Salt pepper
- 1 ½ cups Finely Chopped Pecans
- 4 oz Cream Cheese Softened
- Flavour Paste of Choice We used sun dried tomato paste, roasted galric and pesto are available options, etc
- Food colouring optional
- Place onion and garlic into food processor, blitz until finely chopped. Add mustard, cream cheese, and white wine, blitz until very smooth. Add cheese, blitz once more until mixture reaches desired texture. Taste, season with salt and pepper if desired.
- Line a large plate with parchment paper, and wrap a wring of parchment paper around a large round can – large can of tomatoes works well, we used a can of mango pulp.
- Center can on prepared plate, mound cheese mixture around the can evenly. Using very clean hands (we wear gloves), sculpt the cheese mixture into a rounded ring shape. Once you’re happy with the ring, chill for 2 hours or so.
- With your final display plate nearby, carefully remove the can and the parchment paper from the center of the ring, and carefully turn the cheee ring over onto another plate, or your hand. Transfer (flipping in the process) to the display plate.
- Using a hot wet knife, clean up any imperfections in your ring, if desired. Allow to sit for 10 minutes to warm up slightly.
- Carefully press chopped pecans into all exposed surfaces of the ring, including in the center. Brush away excess nut pieces, chill ring.
- In a small food processor, blitz cream cheese and flavouring paste together until very smooth. If using food colouring, tint to desired colour.
- Transfer flavoured cream cheese to a pastry bag, pipe Black Speech around outside of ring.
Are you a wild cheese freak like us? We've some recipes for you!
Brie en Croute
Easy Cheese Souffle
Grilled Halloumi Salad with Peaches & Figs
Heart Shaped Beer Pretzels with Jalapeno Jack Dip
Hot Cheeseburger Dip
How to Make Fresh Mozzarella
How to Make Fromage Fort
How to Make Proper Queso
Jalapeno Artichoke Cheese Dip
Smoked Cheese Balls
Smoked Jalapeno Poppers